Following is our dumbed-down-so-we-can-understand-it version of a standard Terms and Conditions statement. The original is 1,366 words. The dumbed-down version (in bold, followed by the original) totals 515 words. In
all cases below, the original is in plain type, and our dumbed-down version is
in bold. We go by the original, but offer the DDV for those of you who prefer
things dumbed down, and accept that something may be lost in the process.
By using our site you agree
to all that follows, so read it.
The entire content here belongs to us,
Rivendell Bicycle Works, not you. It’s kind of like when you walk into a store,
or a friend’s house, or a foreign country—you don’t suddenly own it. The site exists to help educate you
about our products and approach, and to make placing an order easier; it’s not
for you to steal for your own purposes. It is not uncommon for somebody to want
to reproduce something in the READ section for a club newsletter, or some other
complimentary and basically good use. If you want to do that, please ask. We’ve
never said No, but we ask that you ask, just as we are asking you to ask. Email
firstname.lastname@example.org, and be specific.
Expect him to say, “include where it came from, but sure, and thanks.” But this
here is not that permission. You must actually ask.
You can’t pretend to be us,
or make a bike or a bag and use our names for it or them.
No matter what we say about
our stuff, how good it is, what it’s good for, or any of that, don’t believe
us. Use this site at your own risk. If your computer goes bonkers or picks up
VD from this site, it’s not our fault, so you can’t sue us. Unless you live in
one of the states that lets you sue us no matter what.
You can’t sue us for
anything, unless the law says you can.
If a price seems nutty, it’s
a mistake, and you don’t get it for that price.
As soon as you log onto this site you
agree to all of our rules, which we can change at any time and without warning.
But you can never violate the copyrights or trademarks, and we shall be
protected from your lawsuits no matter what.
If we have your email, phone
number, or address, we may communicate with you.
We’re in California, so if
you sue us, you’re going to have to do it in California.---and you have a year
after getting your failed widget to do it.
We forbid you to be a mean,
weird jerk, or to pretend to be somebody you aren’t. Also, you can’t steal our
content and say it’s yours, or use it against us, or use it in a way that
somebody else will take umbrage to.
A lot of nuts may read this site and say
stuff about us or our products that doesn’t speak for us. We’re not to blame
for them. If we find out who and where, we can try to remove it. Wish us luck.
You agree not to sue us no
matter what, for any reason, or anybody related to us by blood or business.
It’s a jungle out there, but we didn’t make the jungle.
We’re not big on links, but
if we ever refer you to another site, you’re on your own when you get there.
This goes double for your relatives.
You agree to never exceed the listed rack capacities on our racks. You're asking for trouble and we are not responsible if you break something. You may hurt yourself, but it's your fault.
The original that you still have to read:
READ THE FOLLOWING TERMS AND CONDITIONS OF USE CAREFULLY BEFORE USING THIS
WEBSITE. All users of this site agree that access to and use of this site are
subject to the following terms and conditions and other applicable law. If you
do not agree to these terms and conditions, please do not use this site.
The entire content included in this site, including but not limited to text,
graphics or code is copyrighted as a collective work under the United States
and other copyright laws, and is the property of Rivendell Bicycle Works. The
collective work includes works that are licensed to Rivendell Bicycle Works.
Copyright 2011, Rivendell Bicycle Works ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. Permission is
granted to electronically copy and print hard copy portions of this site for
the sole purpose of placing an order with Rivendell Bicycle Works or purchasing
Rivendell Bicycle Works products. You may display and, subject to any expressly
stated restrictions or limitations relating to specific material, download or
print portions of the material from the different areas of the site solely for
your own non-commercial use, or to place an order with Rivendell Bicycle Works
or to purchase Rivendell Bicycle Works products. Any other use, including but
not limited to the reproduction, distribution, display or transmission of the
content of this site is strictly prohibited, unless authorized by Rivendell
Bicycle Works. You further agree not to change or delete any proprietary
notices from materials downloaded from the site.
“Rivendell”, “Sackville” and “The Lord of the Rings” and the names of the characters, items and places therein are trademarks or registered trademarks of The Saul Zaentz Company d/b/a Middle-earth Enterprises and are used under license by Rivendell Bicycle Works. All other trademarks and trade names used here belong to Rivendell Bicycle Works.
site and the materials and products on this site are provided "as is"
and without warranties of any kind, whether expressed or implied. To the
fullest extent permissible pursuant to applicable law, Rivendell Bicycle Works
disclaims all warranties, express or implied, including, but not limited to,
implied warranties of merchantability and fitness for a particular purpose and
non-infringement. Rivendell Bicycle Works does not represent or warrant that
the functions contained in the site will be uninterrupted or error-free, that
the defects will be corrected, or that this site or the server that makes the
site available are free of viruses or other harmful components. Rivendell Bicycle
Works does not make any warrantees or representations regarding the use of the
materials in this site in terms of their correctness, accuracy, adequacy,
usefulness, timeliness, reliability or otherwise. Some states do not permit
limitations or exclusions on warranties, so the above limitations may not apply
Limitation of Liability
Rivendell Bicycle Works shall not be liable for any special or consequential
damages that result from the use of, or the inability to use, the materials on
this site or the performance of the products, even if Rivendell Bicycle Works
has been advised of the possibility of such damages. Applicable law may not
allow the limitation of exclusion of liability or incidental or consequential
damages, so the above limitation or exclusion may not apply to you.
In the event that a Rivendell Bicycle Works product is mistakenly listed at an
incorrect price, Rivendell Bicycle Works reserves the right to refuse or cancel
any orders placed for product listed at the incorrect price. Rivendell Bicycle
Works reserves the right to refuse or cancel any such orders whether or not the
order has been confirmed and your credit card charged. If your credit card has
already been charged for the purchase and your order is cancelled, Rivendell
Bicycle Works shall issue a credit to your credit card account in the amount of
the incorrect price.
These terms and conditions are applicable to you upon your accessing the site
and/or completing the registration or shopping process. These terms and
conditions, or any part of them, may be terminated by Rivendell Bicycle Works
without notice at any time, for any reason. The provisions relating to
Copyrights, Trademark, Disclaimer, Limitation of Liability, Indemnification and
Miscellaneous, shall survive any termination.
Rivendell Bicycle Works may deliver notice to you by means of e-mail, a general
notice on the site, or by other reliable method to the address you have
provided to Rivendell Bicycle Works.
Your use of this site shall be governed in all respects by the laws of the
state of California, U.S.A., without regard to choice of law provisions, and
not by the 1980 U.N. Convention on contracts for the international sale of
goods. You agree that jurisdiction over and venue in any legal proceeding
directly or indirectly arising out of or relating to this site (including but
not limited to the purchase of Rivendell Bicycle Works products) shall be in
the state or federal courts located in Contra Costa County, California. Any
cause of action or claim you may have with respect to the site (including but
not limited to the purchase of Rivendell Bicycle Works products) must be
commenced within one (1) year after the claim or cause of action arises.
Rivendell Bicycle Works’ failure to insist upon or enforce strict performance
of any provision of these terms and conditions shall not be construed as a
waiver of any provision or right. Neither the course of conduct between the
parties nor trade practice shall act to modify any of these terms and
conditions. Rivendell Bicycle Works may assign its rights and duties under this
Agreement to any party at any time without notice to you.
Use of Site
Harassment in any manner or form on the site, including via e-mail, chat, or by
use of obscene or abusive language, is strictly forbidden. Impersonation of
others, including a Rivendell Bicycle Works or other licensed employee, host,
or representative, as well as other members or visitors on the site is
prohibited. You may not upload to, distribute, or otherwise publish through the
site any content which is libelous, defamatory, obscene, threatening, invasive
of privacy or publicity rights, abusive, illegal, or otherwise objectionable
which may constitute or encourage a criminal offense, violate the rights of any
party or which may otherwise give rise to liability or violate any law. You may
not upload commercial content on the site or use the site to solicit others to
join or become members of any other commercial online service or other
Rivendell Bicycle Works does not and cannot review all communications and materials
posted to or created by users accessing the site, and is not in any manner
responsible for the content of these communications and materials. You
acknowledge that by providing you with the ability to view and distribute
user-generated content on the site, Rivendell Bicycle Works is merely acting as
a passive conduit for such distribution and is not undertaking any obligation
or liability relating to any contents or activities on the site. However,
Rivendell Bicycle Works reserves the right to block or remove communications or
materials that it determines to be (a) abusive, defamatory, or obscene, (b)
fraudulent, deceptive, or misleading, (c) in violation of a copyright,
trademark or; other intellectual property right of another or (d) offensive or
otherwise unacceptable to Rivendell Bicycle Works in its sole discretion.
You agree to indemnify, defend, and hold harmless Rivendell Bicycle Works, its
officers, directors, employees, agents, licensors and suppliers (collectively
the "Service Providers") from and against all losses, expenses, damages
and costs, including reasonable attorneys' fees, resulting from any violation
of these terms and conditions or any activity related to your account
(including negligent or wrongful conduct) by you or any other person accessing
the site using your Internet account.
In an attempt to provide increased value to our visitors, Rivendell Bicycle
Works may link to sites operated by third parties. However, even if the third
party is affiliated with Rivendell Bicycle Works, Rivendell Bicycle Works has
no control over these linked sites, all of which have separate privacy and data
collection practices, independent of Rivendell Bicycle Works. These linked
sites are only for your convenience and therefore you access them at your own
risk. Nonetheless, Rivendell Bicycle Works seeks to protect the integrity of
its web site and the links placed upon it and therefore requests any feedback
on not only its own site, but for sites it links to as well (including if a
specific link does not work).